Rethinking Resilience

A friend sent me an article on resilience. Without getting deep into the overly intellectual weeds, the gist was "how can we teach people to be resilient?"

This is 100% the wrong question. We don't have to teach people how to be resilient. We have to teach people they already are resilient. The problem is they don't see it.

My primary function is to help my clients see in themselves what I see in them. A shy student thinks she's only asking a teacher for guidance on an assignment. I see her as assertive, putting herself first and meeting her needs. I don't teach her how to be those things. I help her see what she already is.

You always find what you are looking for. If you look in the mirror and see a thousand failures, then you will feel like a failure. The good news is it works the other way, too.

When you recognize you are brave, honest or resilient, you like that feeling and you want to capture it again and again. Discover what you already are and be that thing more often.

Think about...
A time you were resilient.
A time you were brave.
A time you asserted yourself.
A time you were comfortable with yourself.
A time you were outgoing.
A time you took a chance.
A time you learned from your mistake

It's all there. Keep looking. You'll find it.

Because you already are everything you want to be. 



For information on individual therapy, contact me at bradleyjabel@gmail.com