Rethinking Be A Man

Never back down.
Don't ask for help.

Don't show emotions...
Except for anger.
Never admit you are wrong.
Be physically tough at all costs.

This is some of the garbage that comes to mind when I hear the term "be a man." History is littered with crimes against humanity perpetrated by macho men acting manly. Even if you have a healthy interpretation of being a man, none of it is gender specific.

Be honest.
Be helpful.
Be reliable.
Be hard working.
Protect and provide for your family.

These are reasonable expectations for everyone regardless of gender. 

We need to reject this toxic call for boys to act like men. If you want to teach your sons something: 

Teach your sons they can be sad.
They can be afraid.  

They can be wrong.

Teach your sons they are loved for who they are,
not for who you want them to be.
Teach your sons compassion for people who don’t look like them.
Or act like them.
Teach your sons there is more to life than running fast
jumping high
and punching hard.
Teach your sons that strength does not come from hurting others.
Strength comes from loving yourself.

Teach your son to reject the urge to be a man.

Teach your son to be a good person.

For information on individual therapy, contact me at bradleyjabel@gmail.com