My primary goal as a therapist

I tell my clients my primary goal as a therapist is to help them see in themselves what I see in them.

I have worked with ages 6 to 60. I can say with absolute certainty that 100% of my clients are far more capable than they give themselves credit for. No exceptions. No asterisk.

I work with teenagers who fight me tooth & nail when I try to reflect back to them how much talent they have.

I work with successful business people who stare at me like I’m speaking Chinese when I highlight how much they have accomplished.

Just this week I met a young woman who plays five instruments and has done so on stage with orchestras. To hear her tell her story, her future is hopeless.

Here’s what she sees: she will never earn a living playing the violin, viola, or stand-up base.

Here’s what she missed: she had the courage to get on stage and share her talents to a potentially critical audience. She displayed a high level of teamwork, interacting with dozens of other musicians in a primarily non-verbal capacity. She spent countless hours working on her craft, developing her talents, committed to the process, doing something that made her happy.

These are skills every employer in the world would cherish in an employee. These are things most of us would love to be able to say about ourselves. And she didn’t see it.

There is no value in beating yourself up and denying that you have something to offer to society. It might be easier than looking deep and seeing your strengths, but easier is rarely better.  

Having confidence will not solve all your problems. It takes more than confidence to overcome trauma. But it does make everything easier. Confidence is the foundation upon which everything in mental health is built upon.     

Give yourself the credit you deserve. Give yourself a pat on the back.

See in yourself what I see in you.  

Do you have questions about a specific situation in your life? Topics you want addressed in future essays? Email me at bradleyjabel@gmail.com

For information on individual counseling, please contact me at bradleyjabel@gmail.com

I’m an LPC and a writer. If you are a mental health professional and need creative consultation for your professional literature, contact me at bradleyjabel@gmail.com